Today I went to get my glasses adjusted – they’ve been way too tight behind the ears causing pain and indentations in my head.  This lady helped me pick out my glasses when I first went there and I had gone back 2 weeks later to pick them up.  It’s been another 2 almost 3 weeks now since then.  I really wanted to pick up my glasses before my trip so I kind of asked the optometrist to ask about them.  I was able to get them before my trip. :)  So today, as I asked the lady to fix my glasses, she was like, how was your trip?  I was like..what the..you remember me? Hahaha, why are all these people so crazy good at memorizing their customers/clients.

These people see tons of people each day that they do not know and some where they will never see more than once or twice ever…and they remember the people?  and their names?  So cool.  It’s easy for me to remember who they are because to me, they are just one person.  But to them, I am one of many.  Crazy.  I like it!

The deli lady remembered my name today!!!!  Today was my third day there..in a row…hahah…

Nice…

A poor title I know…so much for creativity.

It’s been about a week since I’ve embarked on my new adventure!  So far, it’s alright.  I think it’ll definitely take a lot of getting used to.  It seemed so unreal at first – everything seemed to happen so quickly!  But when God opens doors, you got to take that leap of faith and go with the flow.  Everything is so new and so different – from just the day to the day, to the resources, to the whole experience itself of meeting new people and being on the “other side” of making big decisions and really taking ownership of things.

I feel like right now even though things aren’t super smooth that once I get the groundwork set up, it’ll be easy day to day monitoring.  It’s the groundwork that’s the hard part.  I think being where I am now is a great opportunity and experience for the future.  It definitely gives me the exposure and experience to…more.

I hope and pray that things continue to be smooth even though I’ll be gone for about 2 weeks.  I’m also hoping and praying to make some new friends or at least people to just sort of get to know better (more than just the day to day, hi, bye, deal).

I’m terribly excited and terribly scared all at the same time.  Watching one chapter of my life close and stepping into the next.  It feels uncertain, it feels uncomfortable, yet it feels mildly liberating.

It all happened so fast I barely had time to think.  I’ve been waiting for so long and now that it has come, it seems so unreal.

I’m praying that this is God’s leading.  Everything is in His time.

I finally activated my gym membership.  It’s nice to workout – it makes me feel good for the most part.  Things I don’t like about the gym (or maybe this one in particular):

Crowded and Small (I imagined it to be bigger)

Things I like:  Stretching, working out my abs, and doing some light lifting in the aerobics room when no one is in there and with the lights off (don’t worry there is still light from the outside shining through the glass walls).

Things Learned:  I need to alternate body parts that I exercise if I go daily.  I mean, I knew this but didn’t really put it to practice – which left me with cramping muscles that one day I tried to lift.  Also, the elliptical is so much easier than the treadmill.  The treadmill is horrible – but probably a better workout.

I lost the point in this post because I’m tired, so the end.

It’s amazing that what people say can completely alter your outlook on things. In trying to stay positive, I just had someone take my hope from me. Thanks a lot. Maybe I should just face it, but deep down, I still have a tinge of hope. It’s important to help people be positive and encourage them. I’m going to try to hold on just a bit longer.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately and by a lot I pretty much mean non-stop. I feel like I have an incredible amount of stress upon me. I’m beginning to think that all this stress is wearing me down physically and mentally. My shoulders have been really tense and I have knots in them, I don’t think I’ve really experienced such tenseness before. My mind is jumping from place to place and I can’t keep track of it which is making it more difficult for me to focus on things. Although this sounds contradictory, I seem to be constantly seeking things to do and places to go to get my mind off of things.

Thoughts that are floating in my mind…well, they vary, but in general: life direction, relationships with people, understanding God, and other miscellaneous things.

I have, for quite some time now, been trying to find new direction because I know that where I am now is not where I am supposed to be. I realize that if I am in the right place, doing the right thing, I would be happy. I want to wake up each morning and go about the day’s events and think, “yes, this is what I am here for” and feel and know that what I am doing is making a difference, and that this is where I am supposed to be. My recent experience has opened my eyes to something that I strongly desire but at this point I am unsure if it is where God is leading me. Sometimes, we think we know better, we experience, we encounter, we desire, and we seek, thinking that THAT is indeed the solution. But as much as I want something, the question that crosses my mind is, “what if that isn’t what’s best for me…or what if that isn’t part of God’s will?” And partly, I’m thinking that God is teaching me to be patient, to trust in Him, and fully submit and admit that He is in control. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to do this. So I’ve been telling myself to worry less, think less, and pray for His will to be done, and lastly, wait for His timing (because so far, His timing has always been perfect).

I’ve also been thinking about relationships with people – friends, family, and those not yet developed. I feel like, we as people are always seeking more, more, and more. I had had my bouts of sadness whenever I had thought about LA leaving, much before she left. That was on and off and when she left I was sad even though I told myself it was like she was just going on vacation. And then it was fine, I’ve been able to talk to her nearly every day. But then it really hit me on Friday night when I was trying to figure out what to eat for dinner. Normally we just went out and ate – but this time I had no one to eat with. I called up a few people but they were all busy and I ended up going out and grabbing some fast food and coming home to eat it alone. That was hard for me, thinking that I would be spending Friday night doing nothing by myself because all my friends were busy and my best friend wasn’t here to hang out with. In hopes of finding something to do, anything, I texted a friend and a bunch of my friends were going to go hang out and get boba that night. Thank God for that. It was good timing and I very much needed that. It reminds me that people are so interesting, that sometimes those who are afraid of something or appear to not want something, deep down inside really desire it. On the other hand, I have also been praying and longing for that “perfect” (yes, I know no one is perfect) guy to come into my life. I often get in over my head when I start thinking about relationships but I know deep down that if this is something God has planned for me, it will happen. I can continue to go on about relationships, but I think I’ll stop for now.

Throughout all the thoughts of my ever wandering mind, I’m beginning to learn more about understanding God and what He has planned for us. I had read in someone’s blog about praying boldly about things and have been known to recite in my head the verse about “in prayer and petition, bring everything to the Lord.” And so, I’ve been praying, a lot. I’ve been praying for all these things on my mind, what to do with them, what I want, how to trust, etc. When someone prays, they are asking for something, right? It doesn’t matter what the prayer is about, it is about asking God for something. Which made me start wondering, why are we praying, if He already has a plan. Why do we pray for xxxxx when yyyy is already going to happen – that whatever is God’s will is going to happen? I am learning that praying is really about seeking God, hearing Him, listening for His lead, connecting with Him, and discerning what He has in store for me or you. So with that, I will keep praying, keep seeking, and listening for God and what He has in store for me.

I know that this is just one of the lows of the roller coaster ride and I’m looking forward to hitting the high.

6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

This morning I suddenly woke up just before 8:10am. Upon seeing that time on the clock, I literally JUMPED out of bed and freaked out! I was thinking oh CRAP! I’m going to be late for work AND I have an 8:30am meeting which I’m not going to make it to on time. Then as I stood there for a moment thinking, wait, I did set my alarm last night, why didn’t it go off? Oh wait, today is Sunday. WHEW!!!! So I crawled back into bed. But at that point when I looked at the clock, I completely freaked out! What a morning!

I love soda!  It tastes good!  :D  And while it tastes good, it’s pretty bad for you.  It’s basically drinking sugar water.  It’s empty calories.  I think one can of soda has an equivalence of about 10-12 teaspoons of sugar.  When I think of it like that, it sounds pretty disgusting and horrible.

Every day at lunch, I have a soda.  If I bring my own lunch, I will have a can of soda for the day.  If I go out, I will usually drink a cup and refill it togo.  While I think that one can of soda a day is really not that bad, I think getting refills and large cups when eating out is.  But I feel like I’m not getting my money’s worth if I don’t get at least one refill (no matter how big the cup is).

Another thing is not particularly that it is soda I need.  What I need when I eat is something to drink – not just anything to drink like water, but it must be something that has flavor.  If I only drink water during lunch, I will feel extremely thirsty and have dry mouth after lunch to which I need to drink something with flavor.  I think all the soda drinking has really made my taste buds desire some type of sweetness to a drink.

While I can manage not drinking soda and drinking something else during lunch, the thing that soda really provides for me is the caffeine.  If I do not drink a soda during the day, I will have a caffeine headache.  And that does not feel good.

I had awhile back actually cut out soda for about 2 months straight.  I was pretty proud of myself but then it started up again.  I’m trying to lay low on the soda again.  I think a good alternative is iced tea.  It has caffeine (although I think, not enough – as I did experience a caffeine headache one day when I only had iced tea for lunch), is mainly made up of water, and I will only add a little bit of sugar (not nearly as much as 10 teaspoons).  Although, something I have noticed is that after drinking iced tea, I be come increasingly thirsty.  I wonder if that has to do with the tea element.  Does tea dehydrate?  I should look this up.

Well, surprisingly I have not had a soda since maybe last Wednesday or Thursday.  Trust me, that’s a long time.  I’ve been getting my caffeine in alternate ways.  We’ll see how long this lasts.  Although I may be tempted to get a soda if I’m out at a restaurant.  We will see.  Whatever it is, I think cutting back some is better than cutting back none.

It’s sunny, breezy, and awesome outside.  I can tell it is and I haven’t even stepped outside yet.  On days like this, I really have a longing to be outside – to walk around in my shorts and t-shirt and enjoy the nice weather.  But right now, I don’t know where to go!  Where can I go walk around outside and have things to look at aka shops but not be at the mall?

I could go to Carmel Mt, but I don’t really want to go there.  I can’t really think of any other places that have enough shops for me to go to.  I want to do something but I don’t know what to do.  I want to eat something but I don’t know what to eat.  I also don’t know where anyone is so I’m here by myself which makes it a bit lonely.

Chances are I will end up at Carmel Mt. but who knows….